First I just gotta say that I really appreciate how the earth rotates… It makes my day. ***** What happens to naughty rainbows? —> They go to prism. (don’t worry, it’s a light sentence) ***** What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut? “I’m a cashew!” ***** Sorry for the lame Read more about 3 x quick Dad Jokes[…]
— If the virus found the time to become a new version of itself, so can you — A quick reminder for today… You are smarter and more capable than you think you are. (And you probably have more free time than you think you have!) Don’t underestimate your ability to learn new Read more about So can you…[…]
I know it’s lame, but I don’t care! Friday is the most relaxing and fun week day — and if you can’t laugh at a good ol’ Friday pun, then you’re probably taking life too seriously. Most of you already know that Friday is my second favorite F word (my first fav F word Read more about Friday Puns – Everybody likes a good joke on Friday[…]
In 2011, a group of scientists went to a wide open field with 70 dogs. They stayed there for two years documenting, taking photos and detailed notes every time one of the dogs pooped or peed. 💩 After 1,893 poops and 5,582 urinations, they published a study, proving that most dogs face North while they Read more about Most dogs face North when they 💩[…]
Sometimes I do really dumb things. Like the other day, I got home from surfing and realized I had a big cut on my foot… Since the cut was too big for a bandaid, I decided to superglue the skin back together. Well, somehow I ended up supergluing my hand to the bottom of my Read more about I am an idiot 🤷♂️[…]
It’s been 10 months since I started volunteering with Meals on Wheels (just 1 shift per week). My job is to deliver meals to people who can’t source food for themselves. Some clients are sick or disabled, but most of them are just extremely old. It’s not a glamorous job, but I make the most Read more about A few more funny volunteering stories![…]
We had been dating about 6 months. You know that early phase in a relationship… when you’re still getting to know each other, on your best behaviour, etc. One night we were coming back from a dinner date and my stomach was starting to ache. I could feel some gas coming, and tried my Read more about The first time I farted in front of my wife… 🙈[…]
This morning I woke up and my dog’s butthole was right next to my face. 🙁 What a rude awakening! Anyway, the reason I’m happy is… things can only get better from here today. “The most wasted of all days is one without laughter” – E. E. Cummings” Photo by alexandra lammerink
I’m currently on a 13hr flight from Los Angeles —> Auckland. Long flights are tough. But here’s a few tips to help you survive… 1) Bring a small gift or some nice candy for your flight attendant 👩✈️. They will be surprised and hook you up with free beers and other goodies throughout your flight. Read more about Tips to survive a 13 hour ✈️ flight![…]